chasing butterflies
Mallorca - 2018
“youre chasing butterflies”
thats what he told me.
am i being insulted?
or is this guilt scolding me?
“youre reaching for things
youll never be able to grasp”
and hes reaching under my nerves
pulling apart my skin barriers
that hold my blood and muscles intact.
hes been getting good at that.
tearing at the root of my ego,
gnawing on my ‘unrealistic dreams’
ripping up my passions from the stems.
and then his lips turn and he smirks
and he shakes the dirt off his hands,
all while im left to replant myself
in this garden of butterflies.
you see, i dont need ‘balance’
or ‘discipline’ to finish what i start,
because i dont enjoy the endings.
i reach for everything inbetween,
the depth,
the substance,
the wisdom
and mistakes.
i need the h o p e
of growing into something more —
so yes,
ill never grasp a butterfly,
because maybe
im not supposed too.
