escape
We cannot escape our past.
Yet we can master the art of ignoring it.
But it shadows us.
It lurks and it grieves in the backdrop of our spirit,
dragging contradictions and disappointments from our ankles.
Chained to the web of misconceptions
that we've built to cover up the moments
we aren't most proud of.
Entangled in fictional stories
to fill the gaps that we've hid away,
just so strangers can believe we are human.
The sour taste of disgust erupts in our throats
and we can't spit it out,
so we're choking
over the phony "hi, how are you's".
We swallow our scorns and our regrets,
and the acid soaks up in our belly
and that's when we want to disappear
because we know that we are garbage.
Humiliation heats our blood
and guilt fuels our bitterness,
and we are still content living
in this lethargic cycle of deceit
because all we crave is to be loved.
And when we are finally loved and trusted,
we still never lose the chains
because our demons live within us.
They eat away at our happiness
because we don't believe that we deserve this...
and it's a shame
because we cannot wrap our head around the fact
that other people can live with burdens.
